Complexity in perfection

Just a few thoughts, updates, and joys:

My cars repairs are a major slam in my savings account. Between tires, shocks, and brakes I can kiss $1,500 goodbye. Thankful moment though, I heard this news and was overwhelmed by frantic worry and dispair. However I have into that worry for a few moments only. Instead of becoming depressed by my constant financial dispair I immediately took my worry to God. He's already pulled through for me with another miracle! :) thanks Lord for the hallmans and Seitz! Between these two amazing families shocks an brakes are covered and I need only purchase parts and tires!

Another event, my employers dog Brewster is Houdini in the dog form. I took him to amboy with me and he got out of his gentle lead somehow and went romping through the pond and all around the yard. So thankful he was so keane on Mitchell and came right back into our care :)

Both thanksgivings were lovely!

That grand idea of mine awhile back... Is picking up speed. It is about 80% set and locked. Which is closer than its ever been before.

Totally see Gods plan in so many parts of life right now. Things even that bothered me originally I now see Gods hand in it to make my so hoped for future possible. Mitchell moving out, being a nanny, the family I chose to nanny for, the friends I made, putting off beauty school this long, priorities, just everything has worked together for the most ideal outcome I could ever hope for... :)

I'm just... Overwhelmed with joy. :)

Passive me. Aggressive you.

My list of loves:
* Amboy
* Fall, when the leaves are changing color and begin to coat the ground in a patchwork blanket.
* Boots
* BBQ sauce. On everything.
* the scent of hair color.
* Curly hair
* cinnamon
* Baths
* reading manga
* peacocks
* umbrellas
* rings, on every finger
* pearls
* salted hot chocolates
* little bunny rabbits
* what kids say when trying to articulate there thoughts and feelings
* church on Sunday
* drums
* the Vancouver waterfront
* newborn babies
* being in love and being loved in return
* large bodies of water
* a new haircut
* cuddling
* Madelyn Seitz
* a good scripture
* family
* halo
* vampire movies
* the smell of my boyfriend
* lunch with Brianna
* cheese
* new blankets
* chocolate
* Mitchell Oliver hallman, the most.
* dubstep
* a good cover song or duet
* time out with friends
* pineapple
* cedar trees
* lace
* water lilies
* lilacs
* pier one
* teapots
* kittens
* driving

Take it easy on me now my brothers

I'm very excited to say that I have a plan formed and set in motion. With faith and prayers I am hopeful of it prospering. I've a consaltation forthcoming and from there I will see the possibilities a little clearer. Anyways this is privy to few until it is finalized, but I am very happy to have a masterplan in motion... This will be a good thing. I've worked out what it takes, what it will cost. Ultimately though this is my desire it cannot be made real without permission and compromise from others... Still at least I'm fighting for it. At least I'm trying my best. That's all I can do for now.

Just the way the cookie crumbles

The realization that the sick feeling is caused by the separation of a few days and the uncertainty of when you get to be together again. It's silly but it feels exactly like being home sick. Spot on.
<3<3<3

All the things:

Here is... A BIG LIST OF PET PEEVES; also called a rant
* cupboards/drawers left open
* guys wearing toms
* coloring your entire head of hair pink, green, blue, etc. Tacky.
* eyebrow piercings. Lip piercings. Monroes. SEPTUM, I can't even look at you.
* partially shaved heads on girls. Sorry, not admirable... It's actually depressing.
* bad parenting.
* small dogs
* people driving recklessly when they have children in their cars.
* young ppl having sex. Make that unmarried ppl having sex.
* fake eyelashes.
* "don't think he's/she's the one you will marry."worst line ever. No one should ever say that.
* teenagers.
* how fast kids are "growing up" though I think it's how fast they are exposed to every sick aspect of the world that they just know more, but they are really just as immature in the mind as one would expect from the age.
* passive aggressive behavior.
* anyone under 16 with a phone.
* adult cartoons
* the mindset that relationships that started young don't work. False. Many are happier and last because they didn't ef it up a million times
and have all that extra baggage.
* coexist because all those things don't work together and the ppl with them on their cars don't even like it all. Yet I'm pretty sure all those things are taking place in the world, so it's already existing all together so don't even worry about e dry one liking it all.
* irresponsible pregnant women.
* high school

* feminists

To refute the stifling

I'm so blessed. And I realize this. You can see Gods care throughout my entire life. Not many are blessed to be raised in a family as close an loving as mine. My sisters are my best friends and my parents are the people I trust most and who have loved me the best. When my sister married i was lucky enough to gain the absolute best brother ever who i tell everything to and doesn't tell a soul or even hints at knowing everything that he does. I'm even close with all of his sisters and his parents too. :) and where I am now... Wow. At a young age I discovered that what this life of mine needed was my Savior and He has filled any ache or hole in my life ever since I became a believer. Yet now in addition to that gift he has blessed me with maddy and Mitchell. :) a full life of love and laughs, I'm so blessed :)! Those two have brought so many more loving relationships my way too. Both of their family's are so kind and bless me constantly. I'm so thankful for them and their families and my own.

Happy to simply live and love and be loved in return

I'm not getting impatient here :) just working towards what's good and true. I'm tired of being told I'm growing up to fast. Bottom line is I'm older than my years due to many things. I don't feel I'm rushing things. Just taking things as God so brings them. Not every life and person can be compared justly to another. I'm just giving everything I got - that's on the real.

Up to now

While Maddy is napping here are my thoughts...
The life I'm after now, is in some ways so different from the one I grew up expecting. But good news! This one is making me so joyful! Everyday I wake up and feel just so blessed! I now see that it's Gods plan working out, this wasn't mine, and I see now that it is far better than what I had been hoping for. I'm happy with my jobs, close with my family, thankful for where I live, loving my boyfriend and all the ways my life has changed and friendships I've made while with him. As a whole I have been changing a lot in the past few years and I like who I'm becoming. I have many faults but I intend to work on them, and in the mean time I am happy and joyful. I am simply me.

:/

It's the knowing I have to quit that's killing me. I'm to attached, the far off ripping you hear is my aortic valve being pulled violently, breaking my heart.

Set fire to the rain

Listening to: look at me now karmin cover
everyone needs to YouTube karmin and admire their talent... I'm addicted.
It's kind of unfair and probably untrue, but I feel like somehow no one can fully understand the depth of the relAtionship I am in. Why am I feeling the somehow my love is different, truer, purer, deeper than any love the world has seen since Ruth and boaz? It's an unfair thought and I realize that... Yet I still believe it. I doubt that makes sense. I just feel unbelievably blessed by God to be with this boy that it is overwhelming. Falling in love at this velocity will make your head spin circles while your heart fights to break free from your chest and your body trembles in awe of it all. True story.
I am ready for summer sunshine but my body is not lol
I'm budgeting like a fiend. I just feel sort of stuck and I want so desperately to break free and be in mannings!
Xoxo

Constant Knot

Life is crazy now. Its not as i had expected, im finding im growing up quickly and learning that everything takes a great deal of planning and careful tending to take shape. But i am content with the future i see a few years away yet and the path to getting there. Im on my way... I have sought happiness and i have found it in full :)
Life is imperfect, this is true. but I'm striving for the best I can achieve. I've found my passion(cosmetology), I've found my purpose(to glorify God), I've found my love (Mitchell) and it is in said that I've found my happiness :)